


there's something broken about this

by hollyhobbit101



Category: Doctor Who, Doctor Who (2005)
Genre: Alternate Universe - Canon Divergence, Episode AU: s11e09 It Takes You Away, F/F, Hurt/Comfort, Past Character Death, au in which the opportunity to include river song isn't wasted, i just want more river guys
Language: English
Status: Completed
Published: 2019-09-30
Updated: 2019-09-30
Packaged: 2020-11-08 14:43:45
Rating: Teen And Up Audiences
Warnings: Creator Chose Not To Use Archive Warnings
Chapters: 1
Words: 2,957
Publisher: archiveofourown.org
Story URL: https://archiveofourown.org/works/20837213
Author URL: https://archiveofourown.org/users/hollyhobbit101/pseuds/hollyhobbit101
Summary: She'd known it from the moment Hanne's mother had said 'your friend', with that knowing look in her eyes. Even so, the Doctor still hesitated when she saw the woman's silhouette behind the sheet, when she heard the soft humming drifting over to them, a part of her not wanting to believe that the world could be so cruel. And yet...She pulled aside the sheet."Hello, Sweetie."





	there's something broken about this

**Author's Note:**

> Title from 'From Eden' by Hozier

She'd known it from the moment Hanne's mother had said 'your friend', with that knowing look in her eyes. Even so, the Doctor still hesitated when she saw the woman's silhouette behind the sheet, when she heard the soft humming drifting over to them, a part of her not wanting to believe that the world could be so cruel.

"No," she whispered. "It can't be you."

"You alright, Doc?" Graham asked, concern bleeding into his tone.

"I'm fine," she said, clenching her hands at her sides to stop them from shaking. She turned and smiled as positively as she was able, but she could see from their worried faces that they weren't buying it.

"You know who that is, don't you?" Yaz asked softly, eyes full of sympathy. The Doctor felt her stomach flip at her tone, but she ignored it, instead turning back around to face the silhouette.

"Oh, I'd know that voice anywhere," she murmured.

Taking a deep breath, the Doctor headed towards the voice, slowly pulling aside the sheet and stepping round it. She gasped sharply when she saw the woman in front of her, her eyes filling with tears even as she knew she couldn't be real.

River smiled gently at her. "Hello, Sweetie."

Out of the corner of her eye, the Doctor saw Yaz and Graham approaching, but she kept her eyes on River - or the thing that was pretending to be River. "This isn't - This _can't_ be you," she said. "We parted ways on Darillium, there's no way you could be here. It's impossible!"

The Doctor heaved a shaking breath, furiously blinking back tears. River just continued to smile in that knowing way of hers, lips quirked up, eyes laughing. The Doctor's heart ached at the familiarity, and she wanted more than anything to take River into her arms, but she held herself back, instead keeping a wary distance between them.

"Why should it be impossible?" River asked softly.

The Doctor closed her eyes, breathing shakily. "Our time was up," she said eventually, voice quiet. She stared down at the grass, not able to chance a look at her wife, lest she fall apart.

River laughed. "When has time ever made sense for us, my love?" she asked, reaching out and stroking a hand down the Doctor's face. Then, she stepped back and surveyed the Doctor appreciatively. "And, I must say, you've got yourself _quite_ a spectacular body this time."

Despite herself, the Doctor blushed, suddenly self-conscious. "Oh, well, you know. Still getting used to it."

River's eyes roved up and down her body. "I'm sure I can give you a hand with that." She winked, and for a moment the Doctor believed that this really could be her wife. But the moment ended, as they tend to do.

"I'm sorry," she whispered, then turned away, heaving a shaky breath.

"Doctor," River called. The Doctor stopped, but didn't turn around again, unable to look this imposter in the eye. She felt more than heard River step up behind her, her breath tickling the back of her neck. River bent her head forward and whispered into the Doctor's ear, just as she had done oh so long ago, whispered a word that she couldn't possibly know, and yet somehow did, which could only mean...

No. This was some trick; it couldn't be her, it just _couldn't_.

The Doctor shoved aside the sheets and all but fled, her friends staring at her in shock and confusion as they saw her in such a state. She wiped her tears away and clenched her hands into fists to stop them from shaking. The silence was broken by a slightly rustling behind her, and the Doctor knew without seeing that River had followed her out.

"Doc..." Graham started hesitantly. "Who is she?"

The Doctor raised her gaze slowly, looking each of her friends in the eye. "She's my wife."

* * *

"I didn't know you were married," Yaz offered, setting a glass of water down in front of her. They'd all gathered in the kitchen with River waiting outside, albeit not by choice. The Doctor accepted the water with thanks, though she didn't drink it, instead electing to stare into it, as though it held all the answers to the universe.

"I was," the Doctor eventually said. "But she died. I saw it happen. She's dead."

"Hang on, though, that's impossible," Graham interrupted, gesturing to the door. "I can see her - she's standing right over there!"

The Doctor shook her head. "That's not her. It's a shade, or a shapeshifter, or - or _something_. I'm not sure exactly what it is, yet, but I am sure that that is not River Song. And, whatever it is, I hope it knows that it's made a dangerous mistake, taking her form. It won't get away with this, I'll make certain of that."

Yaz glanced over at Graham, seeing the same shock she felt mirrored on his face. She went to say something, but the Doctor interrupted before she could even form the words.

"It's done a good job, though, I'll give it that. It seems to have all her memories, her personality, everything, exactly the way River was. It knows things that only she would know - things that only River can ever know."

"Like what?" Graham asked. Yaz shook her head at him firmly, but he either didn't see it or ignored her. The Doctor pressed her lips together, seeming to consider before meeting Graham's eyes.

"The deadliest, most important secret I've ever had," she answered. "My name."

* * *

They'd managed to get no more straight answers out of the Doctor, and she'd soon left them to fiddle with the mirror again, muttering to herself about something that sounded like 'Zygon'. Yaz had wanted to go after her, but Graham quickly vetoed the idea, knowing that she probably needed space right now.

"What did she mean - her name?" Graham wondered. "I mean, we know her name, don't we?"

Yaz shrugged, looking as equally confused as he felt, but then a voice came from the patio door.

"The Doctor has many names," River said, smiling fondly. "The one you know is the one she chose, the one she is known for right across the universe. But it is not the one she was born with. There are very few who know that name - I am one of them."

"Well, what about it being deadly?" Graham asked. "How can a name be deadly?"

"Oh, that was a little incident a long time ago, and far in the future." She smirked at the perplexed looks on their faces. "Time travel. You get used to it."

"How do we know you're telling the truth?" Yaz demanded. "The Doctor said you're dead, and that you're just a - a shade, or something."

River just shrugged, stepping further into the room. "I did die, it's true. But then I woke up here, after the Doctor saved me - you can ask her about that, if you like. I am River Song. I _am_ her wife."

They looked at each other, Graham suddenly doubting the Doctor's claims. "Maybe we should ask her," he suggested. "It can't do any harm, and for all we know River's telling the truth. Besides, Hanne's mum's here, and she seems real enough."

"I don't know," Yaz said, an edge of doubt in her voice. "The Doctor knows her more than we do, I think we should just trust her on this."

"All the more reason to ask," Graham argued. Yaz pursed her lips, but sighed, relenting - she could see the merits of Graham's argument. "Fine." Graham looked back at River, who smiled almost-innocently at him, then to Yaz. He nodded once, then they left to find the Doctor, Graham trying desperately to ignore the nerves that had settled in his chest.

* * *

Hanne's parents had followed them upstairs, along with River Song. Yaz didn't quite know what to make of the woman - she seemed nice, but there was an edge to her smile, a glint in her eye that had Yaz wondering if she was as benign as she claimed to be. The Doctor had married her, which should count for something, but if this woman wasn't who she said she was... Yaz resolved to keep a close eye on her, even is she really did turn out to be the Doctor's wife. She had a feeling it would be quite necessary.

"I've got it," the Doctor announced, the second they walked into the room. "I can't believe I didn't see it before now; it's so obvious really."

"Uh, what's obvious, Doc?" Graham asked, glancing over at her cautiously.

The Doctor gestured at the mirror. "Right. So. This is a portal, connecting our world - the real world - with this literal mirror world. Only there was a sort of antizone splitting the two, preventing them from ever touching."

"Like a buffer zone," Yaz said.

The Doctor nodded. "Exactly. Five points to Yasmin Khan. Now, antizones only exist if the fabric of a universe - in this case, ours - is under terrible threat, meaning that this universe must be incredibly, incredibly dangerous. And that can only mean one thing." She stopped, looking at Yaz and Graham expectantly. When neither of them answered, she huffed. "The Solitract! I must have told you about the Solitract."

"Nope," Graham said.

"Literally never heard that word before."

"Alright then, when I was little, my gran - Granny Five, that is-"

"Hang on, hang on," Graham interrupted. "You had five grandmothers?"

"Seven, actually, but that's not the point. Granny Five - my favourite - used to tell me bedtime stories about the Solitract. Basically, in the beginning, there was everything that was needed to build a universe, like light and matter and such like. Only it couldn't work because the Solitract was there. It's a consciousness, an energy that our reality just doesn't work with. Everything gets ruined so long as the Solitract is present. So what happened was the Solitract got exiled to its own plane, a separate, unreachable existence. And suddenly the universe worked, because it had been removed."

"So... You're saying we're on the Solitract plane?" Yaz asked. The Doctor turned to her with wide eyes, and a flicker of fear lit up in Yaz's chest.

"I wish I wasn't, but I think so, yes." She turned to stare back at the mirror. "But the question is why? Why has the Solitract copied your universe, with Trine and - and River? What does it gain?"

Before she could say anything else, the mirror suddenly distorted again, and Hanne came bursting through. The Doctor managed to catch her, setting her steady before scanning the mirror with her sonic. She let out a groan of frustration when she checked it. "I can't force it open; the Solitract is controlling it. We need to get out of here, but I can't open it!" She turned to Hanne. "What are you doing here? You shouldn't be here?"

Instead of answering, Hanne turned her head wildly. "Ryan? Ryan!"

Yaz frowned. "Ryan's not here, sweetheart. Was he with you?"

Hanne gasped. "He's still in there with those _things_!"

"We have to get that portal open - _now_!" The Doctor returned to sonicking it, but the mirror wouldn't budge. She groaned again, then whirled on Trine and River. "Send us back," she demanded.

Trine looked taken aback. "Are you mad? I have nothing to do with any of this."

Beside Yaz, Hanne stiffened. "Mum?"

Trine's face immediately softened. "It's me, Hanne. I'm alive, I'm okay." She hugged her daughter, but Hanne pushed her away.

"You're not my mum!" she shouted. "I hate you, whatever you are, and I want to go home!"

The room began to shake, and Trine thrust her hand out, sending Hanne flying back through the portal. Yaz gaped at Trine, who looked shocked at what she'd just done.

"How..." She trailed off staring at her hand. The Doctor looked at her grimly.

"I think you know. How about you do it to the rest of us now?"

"Sweetie..." River Song stepped forward, reaching out towards the Doctor, but Yaz jumped between them. The Doctor had been right; whoever River Song really was, this wasn't her, which meant Yaz couldn't let her anywhere near the Doctor.

"Stay away from her," she warned. "I don't know the real River Song, but I know that you're not her." River cocked her head and smirked, then thrust her hand out, and Yaz was blown back into darkness.

* * *

The room began shaking even worse than before, and the Doctor almost lost her balance as she rounded on River. "You can stop it now. Way I see it, this universe is collapsing - you can't handle more than one of us in here. And you don't want Graham, or a husband. You want a universe, and you can only get that through me. Think about it - if you truly have all of River Song's memories, then you know me. I've seen it all. I've lived longer, seen more, loved more, and lost more. You can have it all, as long as you set my friends free."

Both River and Trine were focused entirely on her now. Erik looked at Trine with horror on his face. "You're not her," he whispered, and without looking at him, Trine sent him back through the portal, dissolving as she did so.

"Good, thank you," the Doctor said. "Just one more, and I'm all yours."

"Doc -" But before he could finish, Graham, too, was gone.

A terrible shudder wracked the building. "You can stop now!" the Doctor cried. "This universe is going to blow! It'll destroy both our universes if you don't stop now!"

Suddenly, everything stopped, and white light shone into the room. The Doctor shielded her eyes from it, and when she opened them again, she found herself surrounded by that light, River standing opposite her.

"Why her?" she asked, barely able to look at this copy of her wife. The Solitract just smiled.

"My own form is boundless, but I have grown fond of this body. As, I know, are you."

Despite herself, the Doctor smiled, memories of River flooding her mind. "Bit of an understatement, that."

"Now, tell me about your universe."

The Doctor shook her head. "There aren't words. It's huge and complicated and so, so beautiful. But it's not the universe on its own that makes it like that - it's the people, who I've apparently just said goodbye to. I'll miss them most, especially my friends." She looked down and, as she did so, she saw her body begin to flicker. "Oh, no," she whispered. Then, turning to the Solitract, "Listen to me, this universe is still collapsing. You have to let me go."

The Solitract shook its head. "Impossible. I control everything here."

"No, you're wrong. Look!" She held up her hand, which was repeatedly flickering.

The Solitract frowned. "You're lying," it said, though it sounded uncertain.

"I promise you, I'm not. If you don't let me go, right now, the universe will collapse, and it will take us both with it. I know you want us to be together, but it can never work!" The Doctor grimaced internally at her own words; the irony of the situation was not lost on her. In any other scenario, she would be doing everything she could to keep River by her side, but this wasn't River.

The Solitract's face fell. "I miss everything."

"I know," the Doctor said, pitying it despite everything. "But I have to leave."

"I'll dream of you," the Solitract promised. It leaned forward and kissed her on the cheek, and the Doctor let it, for once giving in to the fantasy that it really was River. But then the Solitract pulled away, and lifted a hand, blasting the Doctor back through the portal.

* * *

The Doctor didn't look up when they re-entered the TARDIS. "Where to next, fam?" she asked, dashing around the console. Yaz shared a look with Graham and Ryan, then quietly approached her.

"Doctor... Who was she, really?"

"Who was who?" the Doctor asked, but Yaz wasn't fooled.

"River Song. Your wife."

The Doctor's hands stilled on the console and, when she looked up, Yaz was startled to see tears in her eyes.

"I'm sorry," she said. "I didn't mean -"

"It's okay, Yaz," the Doctor said. "River was... She was a whirlwind. I could never keep track of her, which wasn't helped by the fact that we always met in the wrong order. The day I met her for the first time was the day she died."

"What -" Ryan started, but the Doctor shook her head.

"It's complicated. Time travel. You get used to it."

Yaz couldn't help but laugh at that, although she felt bad about it when the Doctor looked at her, confused. "I'm sorry," she explained. "But River - I mean, the Solitract - said exactly the same thing."

The Doctor smiled. "That woman you saw back there... In essence, she _was_ River. She had all of her memories, she sounded exactly like River did, she acted the same. But it could never truly be her, because, in the end, the Solitract was just using my wife's form as a means to an end. The real River was brave, and funny, and she would never say no to a fight."

Yaz smiled softly. "She sounds great."

"Yeah." The Doctor is still for a moment longer, then suddenly burst into action again, racing around and flipping switches. "So, onwards and upwards?"

Yaz looked over at Ryan and Graham. "Onwards and upwards."

The Doctor grinned and yanked a lever. Yaz grabbed on to the railing as the TARDIS jolted, excitement bubbling up in her as they flew off to who knew where.


End file.
